The art of the road trip...
03-May-2005, 09:25 AM
#1
Registered User
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Oshawa, ON
Posts: 432
The art of the road trip...
It has come to my attention that many people in this club feel that driving over an hour is too far to drive unless they "have" to go for a practical reason. For same! And you people call yourselves car nuts! Bah I say! BAH! But have no fear, for I am about to bless you with my wisdom! I will give you the joy that your empty little lives have been seaking. Do I hear an AMEN brothers and sisters?!?!?!
This wisdom is your sacred duty to fullfil. It is the last great freedom that we still have...
THE ROAD TRIP!
Now the thing to remember about road trips, is it is NOT the destination that matters but the journey. There needs to be a destination however, because that is the goal... nay the quest! And the quest must be acheived AT ALL COSTS! This quest could quite simply be the perfect ice cream cone in a little town you visited one summer with your parents. Or it could be that every member in your party has to get a phone number from a local girl. Or, it could actually be a practical reason (example: need repair parts for your lawn mower). Try to keep the destination to be no farther than 2 hours away in good traffic if it is only going to be a day trip. That leaves plenty of time for dinner, dancing, taking pictures, getting phone numbers, and still be able to get home the same day.
Once the reason is established, you need partners in crime.... err... I mean company. Some people to read the road maps, control the stereo, pass the NON ALCHOLIC beverages and munchies that a must for all successful road trips. The more people the better, but I highly recommend keeping the group between 2 to 4 people. It's easier to find tables at restaurants, and when the inevidable game of "pull my finger" starts, the driver will not be so over gassed that he loses control of the vehicle. Also, having multiple people adds to the peer preassure of the situation leading to much funnier stories to tell later.
Money. Make sure everybody brings enough money for the basics. $20 is a minimum. Everybody should kick in a little money for gas too unless the destination is a practical one that would have to be done anyway. The money is needed for drinks, snacks and meals. McDonalds is by far the ultimate road trip food as it is fairly cheap and filling. (Especially the quarter pounder, as it sits in your gut like a brick and you don't get hungry for hours.) When eating munchies on road trips, you should choose your munchies like you would choose your drinking munchies. By that I mean you choose foods that don't hurt coming back up. Motion sickness is always a possiblity.
Cameras... Always bring a camera when possible to aid in the story telling after. Be careful though... there is only one real set rule to a road trip...
WHAT HAPPENS ON THE ROAD, STAYS ON THE ROAD!
Some pictures should not be taken. Especially if said pictures include attached party members kindly asking a cute local lady for directions in various stages of undress... Failure to up hold this rule is grounds for a good old fashioned stoning. (that's with rocks... not herbs people
)
In order to enjoy the road trip... here are some pointers
- Stop as often as possible. Biggest ball of twine, those boring road side history stands, food, bathroom breaks, cute girls etc.
- Try to take minor highways. Face it, the 401 looks like the 401 from Ottawa to Windsor. The whole point is to do and see different things.
- A small cooler with ice will keep pop colder longer. Best to drink pop from bottles with screw top lids. It prevents spilling and waste.
- Baggy cargo pants are your friend. Keep wallets etc in the side pockets, makes for more comfortable sitting, plus prevents pick pockets.
- When stopping for food, try to eat in the restaraunt. Drive throughs prevent "socializing" with the local cuties, not to mention messes are better outside of the car. ***NOTE*** If a food fight starts, (and they usually do) if an innocent bystander is hit, it is considered ASSAULT by Canadian law and YOU CAN GO TO JAIL! Be carefull what you throw at.
Well, ladies and gents... that will get you started. If you are looking for a great destination, Fenlon Falls is a great place. There are locks there where all the boats have to go through. The ice cream is amazing, and it's a cottage town. Lots of bored girls in bikini's walking around looking for something (or someone) to do.
And remember... according to the men and women of the Canadian Arms Forces... the unwritten rule is if you cover 50 miles and/or cross two bridges... it's not cheating
Remember, in the end, the purpose of a road trip is to experience and learn new things. About your surroundings, your friends, and ultimately yourselves.
Have fun!
This wisdom is your sacred duty to fullfil. It is the last great freedom that we still have...
THE ROAD TRIP!
Now the thing to remember about road trips, is it is NOT the destination that matters but the journey. There needs to be a destination however, because that is the goal... nay the quest! And the quest must be acheived AT ALL COSTS! This quest could quite simply be the perfect ice cream cone in a little town you visited one summer with your parents. Or it could be that every member in your party has to get a phone number from a local girl. Or, it could actually be a practical reason (example: need repair parts for your lawn mower). Try to keep the destination to be no farther than 2 hours away in good traffic if it is only going to be a day trip. That leaves plenty of time for dinner, dancing, taking pictures, getting phone numbers, and still be able to get home the same day.
Once the reason is established, you need partners in crime.... err... I mean company. Some people to read the road maps, control the stereo, pass the NON ALCHOLIC beverages and munchies that a must for all successful road trips. The more people the better, but I highly recommend keeping the group between 2 to 4 people. It's easier to find tables at restaurants, and when the inevidable game of "pull my finger" starts, the driver will not be so over gassed that he loses control of the vehicle. Also, having multiple people adds to the peer preassure of the situation leading to much funnier stories to tell later.
Money. Make sure everybody brings enough money for the basics. $20 is a minimum. Everybody should kick in a little money for gas too unless the destination is a practical one that would have to be done anyway. The money is needed for drinks, snacks and meals. McDonalds is by far the ultimate road trip food as it is fairly cheap and filling. (Especially the quarter pounder, as it sits in your gut like a brick and you don't get hungry for hours.) When eating munchies on road trips, you should choose your munchies like you would choose your drinking munchies. By that I mean you choose foods that don't hurt coming back up. Motion sickness is always a possiblity.
Cameras... Always bring a camera when possible to aid in the story telling after. Be careful though... there is only one real set rule to a road trip...
WHAT HAPPENS ON THE ROAD, STAYS ON THE ROAD!
Some pictures should not be taken. Especially if said pictures include attached party members kindly asking a cute local lady for directions in various stages of undress... Failure to up hold this rule is grounds for a good old fashioned stoning. (that's with rocks... not herbs people
)In order to enjoy the road trip... here are some pointers
- Stop as often as possible. Biggest ball of twine, those boring road side history stands, food, bathroom breaks, cute girls etc.
- Try to take minor highways. Face it, the 401 looks like the 401 from Ottawa to Windsor. The whole point is to do and see different things.
- A small cooler with ice will keep pop colder longer. Best to drink pop from bottles with screw top lids. It prevents spilling and waste.
- Baggy cargo pants are your friend. Keep wallets etc in the side pockets, makes for more comfortable sitting, plus prevents pick pockets.
- When stopping for food, try to eat in the restaraunt. Drive throughs prevent "socializing" with the local cuties, not to mention messes are better outside of the car. ***NOTE*** If a food fight starts, (and they usually do) if an innocent bystander is hit, it is considered ASSAULT by Canadian law and YOU CAN GO TO JAIL! Be carefull what you throw at.
Well, ladies and gents... that will get you started. If you are looking for a great destination, Fenlon Falls is a great place. There are locks there where all the boats have to go through. The ice cream is amazing, and it's a cottage town. Lots of bored girls in bikini's walking around looking for something (or someone) to do.
And remember... according to the men and women of the Canadian Arms Forces... the unwritten rule is if you cover 50 miles and/or cross two bridges... it's not cheating
Remember, in the end, the purpose of a road trip is to experience and learn new things. About your surroundings, your friends, and ultimately yourselves.
Have fun!
03-May-2005, 10:07 AM
#2
Registered User
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 3,474
Haha, Fenelon is up near my cottage.
Personally, I feel that a 2 hour cruise isn't very worthy of the name 'Road Trip'. To me, a road trip consists of a spur of the moment decision/destination, sleeping in the car (either while parked or while moving), multiple drivers, and hopefully a border crossing of some sort.
Cheers to all the road trippers.
Personally, I feel that a 2 hour cruise isn't very worthy of the name 'Road Trip'. To me, a road trip consists of a spur of the moment decision/destination, sleeping in the car (either while parked or while moving), multiple drivers, and hopefully a border crossing of some sort.
Cheers to all the road trippers.
03-May-2005, 10:36 AM
#4
Registered User
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Oshawa, ON
Posts: 432
Originally posted by gatherer
I'll have to remember all of that for my one lap of Canada...
Can I reproduce it on my site? (with credit given to you of course)
I'll have to remember all of that for my one lap of Canada...
Can I reproduce it on my site? (with credit given to you of course)
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